How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life

How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life

How Boundary Problems Show Themselves
There are lots of ways that dating suffers when freedom and
responsibility are not appropriately present. Here are a few of them.
Loss of Freedom to Be Oneself
Sometimes, one person will give up her identity and lifestyle to
keep a relationship together. Then, when her true feelings emerge,
the other person doesn’t like who she really is, having never been
exposed to her real self. Heather, in the introductory illustration, had
lost some of her freedom in this way.
Being with the Wrong Person
When we have well-developed boundaries, we are more drawn to
healthy, growing people. We are clear about what we will tolerate and
what we love. Good boundaries run off the wackos, and attract people
who are into responsibility and relationship. But when our boundaries
are unclear or undeveloped, we run the risk of allowing people inside
who shouldn’t be there.

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